What is marriage counseling?

Marriage or marriage counseling, also known as couples therapy, is a special type of psychotherapy for married couples. This type of therapy can help married couples identify and resolve their domestic conflicts.

Usually, this counseling is done by couples who are considering divorce or who are looking for ways to increase intimacy. By doing this counseling, you and your partner can make wise decisions to rebuild or strengthen your marriage.

As with psychotherapy in general, marriage counseling is provided by a licensed therapist, such as a psychologist or psychiatrist. However, the therapists chosen are usually those who have been specially trained to deal with household and family problems or are also called marriage counselors.

However, unlike psychotherapy in general, counseling for husband and wife problems is often short-term. The Mayo Clinic says this consultation can be done by both partners, but it can also be done alone. The treatment plan depends on the problems and conditions of each partner.

Conditions that require marriage counseling

Generally, every married couple, both new and old, who have any problems in the household can do marriage counseling. However, some of the specific problems that are often helped with marriage counseling are:

• There is a communication problem or poor communication.

• Sexual dissatisfaction.

• household financial problems.

• Trust issues, including unfaithfulness or signs of a cheating partner.

• Disagree on parenting.

• Conflicts with extended family, including in-laws or in-laws.

• Substance abuse.

• Anger problem.

• There are frequent conflicts or high levels of stress in a marriage.

• Major life changes that affect marriage, such as the death of a loved one, moving house, a new job, or retirement.

• Power struggle.

Some marriage counseling also sometimes has premarital counseling or premarital counseling for couples who are engaged or about to get married. The benefits of premarital counseling are to help understand each other or overcome differences they had before marriage.

Not only that, abusive relationships or domestic violence (KDRT) may also be helped with marriage consultations. However, sometimes this condition is not sufficiently resolved by counseling, but also requires handling from the police.

What happens during marriage counseling?

Counseling for husband and wife problems is usually done once a week. Generally, these consultations are short-term. However, the healing process of the relationship could take more time. The therapy can also continue as long as the couple is committed to solving the problem until they actually reach a solution.

At the first counseling meeting, the marriage counselor will ask a number of questions to the couple together or individually to find and understand the problem. The counselor will also express his opinion on the matter.

Then, he will also provide a plan and treatment goals that will be undertaken by this couple in the future. The length of therapy and the results to be obtained depend on the motivation and dedication of the couple to this counseling process.

During subsequent counseling sessions, the therapist will help the couple to learn some skills that can help strengthen their relationship. These include:

• Communicate openly with your partner.

• Ability to solve problems.

• Rational discussion of differences.

These things are needed to be able to jointly identify the source of the conflict without blaming each other, and find a way out to fix it.

During the process of finding a solution, the therapist may also provide "homework" for you and your partner. This is usually a communication exercise at home to practice what has been learned during the session. For example, talking face to face with your partner about things that are not stressful without any distractions.

In special circumstances, such as one of you has a mental disorder, substance abuse or addiction, or another serious condition, the therapist may suggest additional types of psychotherapy. The type of additional therapy will be adjusted to the problem that occurs.

Results or benefits that will be obtained with marriage counseling

By consulting household problems with experts, you and your partner will get a number of useful results. Here are the results and some of the benefits that you can get from marriage counseling:

• Helping couples solve their problems and find solutions with new perspectives.

• Obtaining new ways to identify and resolve household conflicts in the future.

• Improve communication with your partner so you feel more heard, understood, and connected.

• Strengthens the emotional bond of a partner.

• Increase the cooperation of couples in undergoing marriage.

• Achieve the ideal household goals that are expected.

• Relieves stress that often arises in marriage.

• Make new commitments or clarify the reasons why they should end the marriage, including finding the right way to end the relationship.

Is marriage counseling effective?

Marriage counseling is believed to be effective in helping household problems. According to the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists, this therapy shows a high level of satisfaction. More than 98% of couples who participated in marriage counseling reported that they were very satisfied with the counseling experience.

The same thing was shown in a study published in the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy. The study reported that marriage counseling was successful in helping seven out of ten couples rediscover the unity of the household.

Although the level of effectiveness is high, not all couples will get the same effect from marriage counseling. There are several factors that can affect the success rate of this counseling for married couples who undergo it. One of them is that the couple has mentally and emotionally decided to end the marriage.

In addition, several other factors that can affect the effectiveness of marriage counseling are:

• The dedication and motivation of you and your partner to change and achieve goals. Therapy will be less effective if one of you refuses to participate or changes.

• The extent to which you and your partner adapt new patterns or perspectives taught during counseling, such as interacting or maintaining communication with your partner.

• Mental disorders or substance abuse. If these problems are not treated, it is difficult to achieve success in counseling.

• Domestic violence may hinder successful counseling.

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